By browsing this website, you agree to have some billion dollar corporation spy on you, collecting your personal data so that they can auction it off to advertisers, so that they can tailor advertisements to your liking, so that YOU can buy more pointless shit that you don't need, nor can afford, from a company that treats its employees like slaves. If you would like to opt out of having your personal data collected, send us email saying that you would like to do so. Just to make sure that it is you, send us a picture of your face, drivers license, birth certificate, and social security number; all of which we promise to erase from our servers in about a week*. (Let's just hope we don't suffer from a data breach during that time frame!) Alongside that, please send us a polaroid picture of you sucking on your thumb while holding up a sign stating the following: "Please Master, stop collecting my data pretty please." After that, send us a video of you climbing Mount Everest to show that you are truly devoted to opting out of the data collection process. All hail our corporate overlords! The modern day interwebs sound great, don't they?
*We might not erase it after a week has passed, so just hope and pray that we do, I guess.